April 29, 30 & May 1, 2011
        Maumee Bay Resort

Gimme - Takeme - Buyme M A C H I N E

Every single day I lead a double life
One is real the other's inside my head

In my own little world I can do what I want
Never have to explain what I've said

My husband tells his friends
"she's got a 'female' condition"
And my kids just think I'm bizarre

They all think I need some professional help
But what I need is a big *Hershey bar

I'm a honey, I'm a sweetie, I'm a chick and a toots
When things go wrong guess who catches the blame

All day long I call my boss MR. Dick
Lucky for me that's his name

I make coffee I write checks and I answer the phone
I make a difference every now and then

At the end of the day, I drag myself home
I just can't wait to get up and start the same s#&! all over again

I'm a mom I'm a maid I'm a taxi cab babe
Stuck in the car pool lane

We've got baseball we've got soccer
we've got freakin' ballet
Excuse me while I go insane

I remember looking forward to the day they were born
Now I can't wait 'til they turn eighteen

I'm a cooking cleaning dusting scrubbing
baking sweeping shopping mopping
gimme - takeme - buyme

I've got parents who are aging
And kids who are raging
Maybe I should just run away

BUT *Richard Gere's supposed to call
And there IS that sale at the mall

Ah what the heck

I guess I'll stick around for one more day!